Kassee's Journey EP. 2: The Mental Game
So, How have things been since we last talked?
KASSEE: A little rough actually! I’m still trying to stick to my plan but to be honest my weight has increased by about a pound. I had some goals that I wanted to accomplish and I wasn’t seeing the progress that I wanted to see, my mind was stuck on a number. I stood in front of my trainer last week and cried right after finally getting under 30% body fat, which should have been a really exciting moment! Alex was excited for me but I was so dead set on that stupid number on the scale. Before our training session he said “Come over here for a minute,” and I’m like, “...Are you going to make me cry? Because I’ve had enough of that for the day!” Anyway, he went as far as pulling out my green card (NWFITCO Trainers use these cards to track workouts/measurements) from when I FIRST joined and said “I feel like you need some perspective today.” He broke it down number by number so that I could see the average number of pounds that I’ve been losing each month, it was definitely what I needed because I had become so obsessed with my weight. He gave me the perspective that I needed and since then it’s been really good! I’ve learned to be okay with the number, it will get there as long as I’m willing to do the work.
On a scale of 1 - 10 how would you rate your performance over the last month?
KASSEE: I don’t know, I’m still putting in the work but I feel like I could do more. Even the things that I have improved on feel difficult at times. I’m trying to raise my intensity with cardio, picking heavier weights...I feel like my trainer is trying to kill meee.
ALEX: Usually!
KASSEE: Maybe a 7? It’s hard because I’m way harder on myself than anyone else, I will say that I didn’t indulge in any Halloween candy! So, yay me!
Alex, what’s your perspective on Kassee’s performance so far?
ALEX: Overall she’s doing great. When we did the weigh-in she was actually averaging more weight loss per month than she has in the last year. Last year she was losing about 3 pounds per month, now she’s losing about 4. So even though it seems like things are slowing down she’s really going faster. More than that it’s just time to step it up!
KASSEE: I’m not a patient person. I’m just not. I want it now! I think that’s the helpful part of having a trainer: They provide perspective that you can’t see. If I had been alone in that moment I would have cried and quit most likely. I would have felt like it wasn’t worth continuing. But I have someone who’s outside of my mind and my emotional state who’s telling me “Let me show you how much progress you’re making,” It becomes a little bit easier to see reality when they spell out like that.
Alex, what did you mean when you said “step it up”?
ALEX: Just more consistency!
KASSEE: Oh he amped up his workouts, don’t let him fool you!
That was also part of him giving me perspective, we talked over it and then I went and did some baddass moves. That was reaffirming beyond the numbers on paper, he showed me other moves that I can do
now! Seeing what your body is actually capable of is pretty amazing.
Alex, how would you rate Kassee’s performance on a scale of 1-10?
KASSEE: And remember how close you’re sitting!
ALEX: Physically I’d say she’s at like an 8 or a 9, mentally about a 6 because she has her ups and downs. She has really high high’s and then she has extremely low low’s. And the low low’s are what mess her up. The other day I gave her a saying that I tell myself all of the time, “We don’t have problems, we just have more work to do.” It doesn’t matter how slow the scale moves, it doesn’t matter if you’re not seeing changes as fast as you would like to. It will never be as fast as you want it to be, she’s an impatient person just like everybody else. You always want to reach your goal TODAY but it takes a lot more work, so just keep doing the work.
You probably can’t put this in the interview but I’m constantly reminding her to tell that voice in her head to F@!& Off!
KASSEE; You know what’s funny is he actually said that to me! He looked me in the eyes and said “The number doesn’t matter. You’re still doing the work, tell the voice in your head to shut up!” It’s easier said than done, I lean towards comparison and I was starting to do that with other people, “She’s moving heavier weights, she weighs this and she’s doing that.” I found myself in a position of being impatient and full of comparison. That’s where I rely on my trainer to tell me that not everybody is the same and that our bodies operate differently.
How well would you say you’re balancing everything in life right now?
KASSEE: *laughs* I’m not, I’m clearly not! I have a 12 year old son who’s struggling with distance learning, we have chaos in the world and things are just really loud. It's very hard to pour energy into your goals when it’s spread out elsewhere. I’ve been working on practicing patience and being forgiving with myself. If I want to eat out it’s OKAY, it’s okay to do that! It’s just a matter of making sure it fits into my nutrition, if I do slip up then tomorrow’s a new day. Learn the lesson, realize that those actions slow your progress and fix it.
It’s not supposed to be torture! You’re supposed to feel good about making those changes and seeing yourself make progress. I had a conversation with my son over s’mores one day and he said “Oh, you probably can’t eat this” and I’m like, “ACTUALLY, I can eat whatever I want to! I just have to make sure it fits into what I’m working for.” In that moment I feel like he understood that he can eat what he wants, that’s an area that I’m pushing hard for: I want him to understand that nothing’s off limits, it’s all about moderation.
What are your plans for the next month, and what changes do you plan on making?
KASSEE: I want to push hard, stay focused and see what kind of progress I can make. I need to put less energy into the numbers, I rely on my trainer to point me in the right direction and let me know when I need to step it up. I rely on him to back me up with meal prepping, comparing calories, supplementation. I’m going to pay less attention to the numbers and I’m going focus more on the ways that I’m challenging myself.
ALEX: It’s that battle between your ears that makes the most difference. If you can’t control what that voice says or at least point it in a positive direction it will shut you down. So tell it to shut the F@#$ Up.
KASSEE: Don’t beat yourself up! Be willing to ask for help and encouragement from people who are moving in the same direction as you.
I noticed a lot of people were really inspired by our last conversation, how are you feeling about that? Is there anything you have to say to those people?
KASSEE: It’s kind of surreal, I never imagined that it would be a big deal to anyone. I’ve always been the one reading the articles about other people making progress. I actually had a young girl who reached out and called me an inspiration, she wrote a note to me
and I just melted. I never imagined that just being myself would be inspiring. Like I’m not anything special, I’m not anything fancy. I’m just putting in the work! For the first time in my life I want to know what it’s like to not quit on this journey. I’ve made these steps before and every time has something happened and where I chose to give up. The difference is that I have this huge support system now, they help me push through! I’m hoping that eventually I can be that for someone else, I want to be the person who gives an encouraging word to people when they need it! We’re all at different levels but our goals are attainable!
Any closing thoughts?
KASSEE: ...Alex needs a shower! *bursts out laughing*
Stats so far:
10/17- Weight: 182lbs BF%: 30%
11/4 - Weight:183lbs BF%: 29%
Next check-in we’ll be chatting about the parts of losing weight that rarely get covered. Tune in next month for Episode 3: The Mush!